that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize