Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize