ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
