Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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