You're so nebulous sometimes
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
