This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
whose ass print is on the piano?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
