Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
