I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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