I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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