I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
