doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Randomize