It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
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