have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
