its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize