I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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