he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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