It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
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Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
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Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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