Umm I'm too high to move.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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