So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize