I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
vagina is talking i cant
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
