im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Sorry about my life...
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
