i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Randomize