i don't like sucking hair
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
