We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
