Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
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