Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.

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(516): There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office. http://tfl.nu/aczu

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(708): View more from Illinois

After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."

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(708): After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded." http://tfl.nu/j96i

Replies (51) Good night (6738) Bad night (715)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.

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(202): Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death. http://tfl.nu/mvsk

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(317): View more from Indiana

I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .

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(317): I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket . http://tfl.nu/mvi5

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(307): View more from Wyoming

Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.

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(307): Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again. http://tfl.nu/btf1

Replies (60) Good night (7266) Bad night (1099)
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(703): View more from Virginia

of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.

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(703): of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES. http://tfl.nu/3o3r

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(225): View more from Louisiana

She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers

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(225): She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers http://tfl.nu/m8b0

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(303): View more from Colorado

We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences

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(303): We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences http://tfl.nu/lf6j

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.

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(832): Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome. http://tfl.nu/ycrs

Replies (7) Good night (664) Bad night (1145)
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(907): View more from Alaska

This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.

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(907): This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/qu4g

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.

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(412): Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently. http://tfl.nu/q1xe

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Cute underage boy is in my house.

(410): View more from Maryland

OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.

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(610): Cute underage boy is in my house. (410): OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE. http://tfl.nu/uq1q

Replies (13) Good night (1523) Bad night (451)
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(303): View more from Colorado

And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.

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(303): And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked. http://tfl.nu/770z

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(616): View more from Michigan

The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".

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(616): The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag". http://tfl.nu/vc6w

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(863): View more from Florida

Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.

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(863): Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house. http://tfl.nu/4quh

Replies (6) Good night (748) Bad night (263) Order T-Shirt

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