i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.