Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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