I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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