i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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