Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I'm too high and old for this...
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
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