We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
