I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
