Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
where are my eyebrows?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize