You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
