I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize