How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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