Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
