There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
