saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
