You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
