I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
