sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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