oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
