he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
