I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Where are you guys?
Drunk
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
