Duck Duck Cougar?
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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