I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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