Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
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she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
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My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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