We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
