I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
